Oceans of/and Grief

I sit by the ocean and cry

Tears mirroring the water’s composition

Grief and anger crash and recede like waves on rocks

Have I ever felt seen like this?

Tears have been hard to come by lately

But sitting in front of this wonder that sees right through me

Releases me from the shame of having emotion

Releases me from fear of FEELING emotion

Sometimes I hold the world’s pain on my shoulders

Because I understand the feeling of not having such pain acknowledged

I tense my muscles and brace hard

As I try to make sure that no one else ever has to hold this burden alone

The ocean, so gentle yet harsh, takes it all from me

For it is more immense than any of us and will be here long after we pass

The ocean can create and destroy, and right now

It’s polishing me - carving away these craggles formed by grief

I sit by the ocean and write a poem

For myself, my ancestors, for others like me

For all those who had to stay “strong” and carry burdens for others

I sit by the ocean, tears streaming down my face, and write this for us